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To me, weak from a psychological perspective, is to be "seemingly" unable to take action. If I am not called on to act, then my weakness is not exposed. One of the best and most prevalent examples of this kind of weakness is the refusal of many people to speak in public - in fact, it's the number one phobia in Western society with fear of death second. Logically, it appears that many people would rather die than give a speech!

What are phobias other than clinically defined weaknesses? "Oh, I am agoraphobic - I just cannot leave my house!" Is this not a conditioned fear reflex to avoid contact with the world? It is not my intention to delve into phobias; although that is a fascinating subject. I do have compassion for people with phobias. I mention phobias in this commentary simply to illustrate weaknesses that are easily recognized.

OK, so how do the weak practice tyranny? It is really quite simple. The basis for all psychological weakness is a refusal to take responsibility for one's actions. For example, if I complain to Sandie (the editor of PlanetLightworker) that I just can't write this month's commentary, "I have writer's block so bad," my hope is that she will say that she will find someone else to do it or she will write it herself. (If you know her, then you know there is no chance that she would say that, but this is just a fictitious example - allow me my fantasy!)

I have shifted the responsibility of my commitment to write the commentary to someone else, and my excuse is that I am too "weak" to write it. The weak prey on the strong to take on their responsibilities, and the strong, having pity or sympathy for the weak, often do. Sometimes the strong "take over" because they feel guilty that they are strong whereas others are weak. What is the result?

The strong person adds to his workload, and may need to postpone or cancel his own tasks to take on the unexpected burden dumped on him by the weak person. The weak person has once more received reinforcement that, "Hey, this weak act really works! I'm going to do more of it." The weak person soon has others opening jars, solving computer glitches, reaching for items on the top shelf, and generally solving "problems" for which the weak cannot seem to find solutions. It is manipulation of a highly developed and subversive order.

The weak have often appeared in fiction as a foil to the strong, and often emerged victorious. In Tennessee Williams famous play, A Streetcar Named Desire, the main character, Blanche Dubois, asserts, "I've often depended on the kindness of strangers," as she seeks to manipulate her sister and brother-in-law with her "weaknesses." Often the manipulations by the weak of the strong lead to the undoing of the strong and the triumph of the weak. Why does this happen in real life?

I think it is confusion by the strong over support versus SUPPORT. The un-capitalized version, support, is well explained by the tale of the man who feeds his hungry neighbor a fish everyday. Once he began the practice, he was stuck with giving Tony a tuna every day, day after day. He is sucked into the belief that he is "supporting" another human in need. Finally the fisherman (who had not had a day off in months) gets disgusted and sneaks away in the middle of the night. Tony is left to fend for himself, but luckily, he thinks, a new neighbor moves in next door - a new mark, ripe for the pickings.

The new neighbor is also a fisherman, and the first day that he brings in his catch, Tony is on the dock with his hand out. The new neighbor stares at Tony, and walks away leaving Tony empty handed. The next day, the same thing happens, only Tony (now quite hungry) won't take no for an answer. The fisherman stares at Tony for a moment, and says, "OK, I get that you are hungry, but I am not going to feed you. What I will do is take you fishing with me tomorrow and teach you how to fish, and then you don't need me to provide you with food. You can catch fish whenever you want."

Tony doesn't like this, but he is really hungry - no dinner again tonight - so he agrees. Bright and early the next morning, he is on the dock and learns to fish. His life then shifts.

The new neighbor gave Tony SUPPORT.

As a Lightworker, I have often provided support when what was in the highest and best interest of the person I supported was to offer him SUPPORT. If I offer support, then I am reinforcing the person to run in a circle, unable to move forward in his life. He is always "angling" for the fish. If I offer him SUPPORT, I empower him to move forward in his life. What does that look like? Mostly, it is SUPPORTING someone to do that which he does not want to do - take responsibility for his life. Tony did not want to catch his own fish - he wanted someone else's. As long as he got a fish everyday, all was well until the next day. Tony knew that there might come a day when the fish would be absent, and he feared that day. The fear was always there lurking beneath the surface of consciousness. Yet, he lived with the fear rather than take action to release it. Tony took the offer to learn to fish because his fear of starving was greater than his fear of failing to learn to fish.

This is very common, and the dynamics of it are subtle. From an objective perspective, why would anyone submit himself to constant fear when he could release it? It is because there is a greater fear of failing than the fear of not being supported. In the hierarchy of fear, the greatest fear takes precedence even it means facing some lesser ones.

To SUPPORT someone is to help him learn that taking responsibility for his life is very empowering - he gains a power that carries him through the worst of times and enables him to capitalize on the best of times. This is the essence of leadership - providing others with what they truly need, not what they think they want. In this sense, we can all be leaders. Leaders are far more than bosses, managers, presidents, and others placed in charge.

Real leaders have great compassion and the ability to discern true need from weakness.

How will you practice leadership and overthrow the tyranny of the weak?

SUPPORT versus support. Choose.

Be well and discern with compassion,

Ron McCray